Sometimes...
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Perfect Imperfection...
The spotlight is on...
Walking through those curtains, I feel no physical change..
It's almost as if I become robotic, my mind kind of goes blank, I sigh when I pick up that familiar bottle of methylated spirits to clean the pole & the stage floor..
Martini is ready to perform..
I know the butt man from the genital man from the breast man..
It's not hard to guess, he catches your eye before lingering on the object of desire.. than looks away as uninterested.. I guarantee, if I emphasis that desire.. he'll notice & than he's mine..
Silly rabbit..
Backstage.. sometimes I don't see myself in my reflection.
I have a different look in my eye, I guess that's dissociation..Don't get me wrong though.. I love my job, I've found my calling..which isn't stripping but it's pole dancing. I do what I do.. Im proud of how far I've come & how far I intend to go.
A year ago, I was a completely different person. It's a shock to the system when you have your life set out for you. I know exactly what I want & how to get it.. Figure that's why I'm living fast now..
Walking through those curtains, I feel no physical change..
It's almost as if I become robotic, my mind kind of goes blank, I sigh when I pick up that familiar bottle of methylated spirits to clean the pole & the stage floor..
Martini is ready to perform..
I know the butt man from the genital man from the breast man..
It's not hard to guess, he catches your eye before lingering on the object of desire.. than looks away as uninterested.. I guarantee, if I emphasis that desire.. he'll notice & than he's mine..
Silly rabbit..
Backstage.. sometimes I don't see myself in my reflection.
I have a different look in my eye, I guess that's dissociation..Don't get me wrong though.. I love my job, I've found my calling..which isn't stripping but it's pole dancing. I do what I do.. Im proud of how far I've come & how far I intend to go.
A year ago, I was a completely different person. It's a shock to the system when you have your life set out for you. I know exactly what I want & how to get it.. Figure that's why I'm living fast now..
copyright Martini Sundae 2009
Monday, December 28, 2009
PeepsHOw
Amateur...Still need to find the perfect photographer for my professional shoot...
That pic was taken in the peeps... More than six months ago.. I look different now, healthier, thinner, happier...
Diaries of a Dancer//v.2
Only two more days left of 2009. I've been in the industry for a little over a year now.. & my, how I've grown.
Mentally, physically, emotionally..
I've taught myself how to tap out & become the machine, I've found the fuel for my fire.
Today brought exciting news! 'Midori' (I shan't divulge legal names), & I are now working for Dreams Gentleman's club in Melbourne. As of the 25th of Jan until the 2nd of Feb, whilst on holiday. Why not gain some work experience & network while we're there?
My last experience in Melbourne didn't go as well as one had hoped, I worked the Peepshows of Club X located in the Melbourne CBD. It was putrid. I'm unsure of any other way to describe the ses pool that peepshows are.
98% of the pitiful excuses for males that walk into that shop expect sexual favors & won't think twice about soliciting you for sexual acts. I find it repulsive & degrading. Every single man I performed for made me murderously ill.
Once upon a time, a fool told me that a peepshow girl will always remain a peepshow girl. I beg to differ... I had believed this, at one point, I guess I was young, naive, unaware of how little I could do as long as I emitted the right amount of beauty & sex appeal whilst doing & all of a sudden.. I was making a grand a night, instead of $170 after five, repugnant hours of watching them batting their cocks over me.
Than, on the way to a private function one night, a strong soul told me that only the most beautiful rose will grow in shit. His most beautiful dancers had come from the peepshows themselves.
And so, you find me here today.. Having known nothing & now performing for two of the best striptease clubs in Australia, writing these words to you, my reader..
Stay tuned <3
copyright 2009 Martini Sundae
Mentally, physically, emotionally..
I've taught myself how to tap out & become the machine, I've found the fuel for my fire.
Today brought exciting news! 'Midori' (I shan't divulge legal names), & I are now working for Dreams Gentleman's club in Melbourne. As of the 25th of Jan until the 2nd of Feb, whilst on holiday. Why not gain some work experience & network while we're there?
My last experience in Melbourne didn't go as well as one had hoped, I worked the Peepshows of Club X located in the Melbourne CBD. It was putrid. I'm unsure of any other way to describe the ses pool that peepshows are.
98% of the pitiful excuses for males that walk into that shop expect sexual favors & won't think twice about soliciting you for sexual acts. I find it repulsive & degrading. Every single man I performed for made me murderously ill.
Once upon a time, a fool told me that a peepshow girl will always remain a peepshow girl. I beg to differ... I had believed this, at one point, I guess I was young, naive, unaware of how little I could do as long as I emitted the right amount of beauty & sex appeal whilst doing & all of a sudden.. I was making a grand a night, instead of $170 after five, repugnant hours of watching them batting their cocks over me.
Than, on the way to a private function one night, a strong soul told me that only the most beautiful rose will grow in shit. His most beautiful dancers had come from the peepshows themselves.
And so, you find me here today.. Having known nothing & now performing for two of the best striptease clubs in Australia, writing these words to you, my reader..
Stay tuned <3
copyright 2009 Martini Sundae
Sunday, December 27, 2009
Diaries of a Dancer
Stripper. Exotic Dancer. Striptease Artist..
Whatever she is in your eyes, it's who I see in the mirror everyday. She's empowering, she's refined, she's scared shitless of the lifestyle yet it's apart of her now. She's hooked.
Time's have most certainly changed & whilst striptease is no longer such a taboo subject, it's still struggling to shake the seedy image it's hidden under for so long.
When I catch public transport, I sometimes wonder if the sweet, elderly woman sitting next to me knows what I am.. Every man that glances in my direction, I wonder if he see's.. if he has seen & if he will.
Each Buck that I take up onto stage, humiliate & tease, I wonder what his soon- to- be wife would think of this.
My performance is theatrical. I am a performing artist, I can feel it in my blood, I was born to do this. The sexuality & appeal that I display is real but not personal.. Whilst Im affecting your emotions, mine remain the same. Martini is a strong lady to crack & this job, is purely professional to me. Besides, out of respect for myself, I could never sleep with someone who had paid too see me naked.
So I start these entries, not only in order to record my experience's & my thoughts but too give you, the reader, an inside view of the heart & soul that goes into striptease.
One thing I must stress to you is that in this industry, you can either go up or down... And trust me.. I intend to soar..
copyright 2009 Martini Sundae
Whatever she is in your eyes, it's who I see in the mirror everyday. She's empowering, she's refined, she's scared shitless of the lifestyle yet it's apart of her now. She's hooked.
Time's have most certainly changed & whilst striptease is no longer such a taboo subject, it's still struggling to shake the seedy image it's hidden under for so long.
When I catch public transport, I sometimes wonder if the sweet, elderly woman sitting next to me knows what I am.. Every man that glances in my direction, I wonder if he see's.. if he has seen & if he will.
Each Buck that I take up onto stage, humiliate & tease, I wonder what his soon- to- be wife would think of this.
My performance is theatrical. I am a performing artist, I can feel it in my blood, I was born to do this. The sexuality & appeal that I display is real but not personal.. Whilst Im affecting your emotions, mine remain the same. Martini is a strong lady to crack & this job, is purely professional to me. Besides, out of respect for myself, I could never sleep with someone who had paid too see me naked.
So I start these entries, not only in order to record my experience's & my thoughts but too give you, the reader, an inside view of the heart & soul that goes into striptease.
One thing I must stress to you is that in this industry, you can either go up or down... And trust me.. I intend to soar..
copyright 2009 Martini Sundae
Love Me
I am so foolish & naive..
I must have forgotten, shattered glass does hurt
I once more reach my bare hands,
Naked fingers...
Trying to mend the shattered glass.
The pieces sparkling & shining,
The starry firmament.
A touch, a grasp, a shrill chill,
Rouses me from my tormented sleep..
Blood red tears pouring out from the wounds.
Deep down from the phalanges,
Of every finger tip, finger pad, finger joint
Of my thumbs, index, middle, ring & little fingers..
From the cuttings of my heart, head & life lines...
Falling apart on my palms-
The inflaming magma flowing, running down..
Overwhelms the veins..
In every part of my body..
Pain
copyright 2009 Martini Sundae
I must have forgotten, shattered glass does hurt
I once more reach my bare hands,
Naked fingers...
Trying to mend the shattered glass.
The pieces sparkling & shining,
The starry firmament.
A touch, a grasp, a shrill chill,
Rouses me from my tormented sleep..
Blood red tears pouring out from the wounds.
Deep down from the phalanges,
Of every finger tip, finger pad, finger joint
Of my thumbs, index, middle, ring & little fingers..
From the cuttings of my heart, head & life lines...
Falling apart on my palms-
The inflaming magma flowing, running down..
Overwhelms the veins..
In every part of my body..
Pain
copyright 2009 Martini Sundae
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